Taking on a serious topic today: boys.
Recently, a few of my girlfriends have been dipping their toes in the dating scene and were in situations where they were regularly seeing one guy.
Let’s take my friend not named Kitty. There’s a guy she’d been on several dates with; they were having a great time, enjoying each other’s company. Weeks passed, and things were comfortable. She has a gentleman caller to go back to and have fun with from time to time. No strings attached; it’s pretty ideal for the moment, what with there being university deadlines, working part-time, having a social life, and needing to sleep – there’s no need to dedicate too much time to the guy.
Kitty isn’t looking for anything. She has in her head that this is just casual, but, of course, she likes the guy a lot and drunkenly messages him saying, “I like you. You’re really great.”
The morning after, the guy says, “I don’t know what to say.”
Time passes; Kitty thinks things are weird. Things are weird. Then she messaged the guy asking him to explain what’s going on in his head, and he says, “I don’t want to be your boyfriend.” Stop the presses, Smitty. WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
The number of times gal pals and I have had a guy assume we want marriage and babies and a mortgage and a dog and lifelong commitment is a little silly. Just because I want to spend more time with you outside of being drunk or hungover does not mean I want to call your parents mine.
As amusing as it is, it can become quite frustrating, and on few occasions, it has led to further misunderstandings, complications, and even ruptures in friendships. Open communication is the solution to everything, but it is understandably difficult sometimes.
I guess I’m just venting today, and I’m sure there are a bunch of others out there who feel the same way after experiencing the same thing. Guys and gals can want casual; guys and gals can want commitment. Just talk to avoid any unnecessary embarrassment/frustration/confusion.